Hi there,

I’m Tom.

I’m Washington DC-based humor and satire writer for publications like The New Yorker and McSweeney’s Internet Tendency.

My satire book Chud Buffly’s MANTHOLOGY: 365 Alpha Maxims Guaranteed to Help You Know Everything, Feel Nothing, Get Jacked, and Never Die comes out in 2026, and is guaranteed to contain at least 100 pieces of punctuation.

Explore my work here, subscribe below for updates, or say hello!